Back on Land

He deploys, and I make a life back on land.

Second Guess Yourself Tuesday

5 Comments

I woke up this morning and knew within moments what day it was.

Second Guess Yourself Tuesday.

My first thought of the day was, “Should I have gotten up earlier? Is it right to ask the teens to make their own lunches?”

I stumbled out of bed and into the family room and thought, “Am I spending enough time with the kids individually? Do they really know how much I love them? Am I affectionate enough?”

As I watched Sydney walk up the street to her bus stop, I wondered, “Am I really doing everything I can to help her have success in school? Does she know I’m proud of her all the time anyway?”

The morning has continued in much the same direction …

“Should I have tried harder to make it to that class I missed?”

“Was I really fair when I said that?”

“What did she mean by that? Was it rude, or am I just being overly sensitive?”

“Should I have been nicer, more caring, more nurturing?”

“Am I the example of the kind of woman I want my girls to grow into?”

“Am I being true to who I am? Am I trying to become something I’m not, or is this just growth is new direction? And how can I really know the answer to THAT?”

Sigh …

It’s “Second Guess Yourself Tuesday,” and frankly, it sucks. I am a take-charge, I-can-do-this, don’t-look-back kind of gal … usually. I try hard to make good decisions and give things careful thought … mostly. I make mistakes and own up to them …generally speaking. I’m not perfect, and I know it … always. I am okay with me, my life, and my decisions … for the most part.

But today is “Second Guess Yourself Tuesday,” and today I just don’t know.

P.S. The stove top cleaning post will have to come later this week … It wasn’t the success I wanted it to be so I’m working on some alternatives … I hope.

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5 thoughts on “Second Guess Yourself Tuesday

  1. I’d like to say it’s okay to have a Second Guess Yourself Tuesday … but I know it must just feel crappy to have that. So instead I will say that I hope you decide not to beat yourself up too much about it … and I hope you have a “Well Today Is Definitely A Better Day Wednesday” tomorrow.

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  2. Yes, teens can make their own lunches. My 11 year old should probably make his own lunch but I still do it. But I think when he’s 13, I’ll pass it onto him. I know I question a lot of my choices too.

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  3. Pingback: Friday 5: This Week! | Back on Land

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